Apples, Onions & Coping with Uncertainty

Photo credit:  @ericmogie

Photo credit: @ericmogie

“Life is like an onion. You peel it off one layer at a time, and sometimes you weep.” - Carl Sandburg

Some problems are like apples, while others are more like onions.

Sometimes when you try to reach the core, all you find are more layers.

Cancer taught me not every problem has a core issue that can be clearly resolved.

Some issues are more like onions— seeping into our everyday life and changing the essence of everything they touch.

Have you ever tried to peel an onion completely to its core?

Once you start peeling layer by layer, you will find that the center of the onion is simply another layer waiting to unfold.

In many ways, 2020 has been like one giant onion.

Layer

upon layer of

Unprecedented.

Undeniable.

Unavoidable.

Uncertainty.

This year has been full of moments where I wanted to crawl out my skin from the itchy, uncomfortable feeling of constant overwhelm.

I’ve felt a mixture of anger, confusion, fear and downright insanity as the boundaries between working, schooling, parenting and society continue to blur and bend.

On top of chronic health challenges, I’ve been juggling work and homeschooling, plus my family was recently displaced out of our home for nearly four months due to extreme water damage. 

It’s so easy to get lost in this idea that we are only feeling one thing when, in reality, many layers are happening at once.

Life can’t always be boiled down to this or that.

Sometimes it’s this AND that.

You can be both.

Grateful AND grieving.

Exhilarated AND exhausted.

Determined AND disappointed.

Hopeful AND heartbroken.

As we peel back and work through each layer of ambiguity and move towards understanding what this “new normal” means heading into 2021, we may be met with tears and untold resistance.

Yet each layer serves a purpose and strengthens the whole.

Onions remind us of the importance of staying firmly rooted when those around us try to cut us apart. They are proof that even the tiniest pieces can make a huge difference.

Maybe apples and onions are God’s way of reminding us you can’t have bitter without a little sweet, and some things can’t be truly understood until they pass through all of our senses.

Ultimately, it seems the only way to truly know the difference between an apple or an onion is to taste it for yourself.